Esther

As a little girl, Esther was one of my favorite Bible stories. And throughout my life it has continued to be a favorite, although I am sure my perceptions of it have changed or rather deepened. Recently, a friend let me borrow a fictional book: "Hadassah: One Night with the King. At first I couldn't stand the book. I understood that it was fictional, but the fiction parts seemed so stretched and outlandish, and parts seemed to actually contradict the Bible and historical facts.
However, as I have gotten farther into the book, I have changed my mind. While certain facets of it might not measure up against historical & Biblical reliability, others parts have caused me to stop and think.

How did Hadassah become orphaned? Natural causes or was her family murdered? Was there good reason for Mordecai wanting her to hide her Jewish heritage. Did they hide it for her whole life?

In the beginning of the book, Hadassah is filled with hatred for God for allowing hardships to befall her and her loved ones. Yet, as she is taken to the palace and separated from what little she has left, she becomes drawn to God in a way she never has before.

I like some of her quotes in the earlier pages of the book, as she is looking back on her life, she writes, "I only suppose that if I possess any depth of person at all - and I use this term only because others have used it on my behalf - it must be due to the equal depths of grief and inwardness that my childhood traumas had carved in my soul. I grew up a quiet child, I've already pointed out. In fact, Mordecai informs me that I hardly spoke for nearly a year after the murders. I must believe him, for that period I remember absolutely nothing. the fog obscures everything. And I must admit that although I would not wish my losses on anyone, I do believe that long periods of silence and introspection do a great deal to enrich a person's spiritual and emotional dimensions" (69).

The last part especially stood out to me. A person is often only as deep as the well of sorrows they have experienced. It is the hardships of life that not only test, but form our character.

I also have found the conversations between Esther and Hegai interesting. How did Esther come to trust Hegai? How did Esther come to be favored by Hegai? In the book, Hegai guesses that she is hiding something and even that she is Jewish even after she reveals her real name to him.

Esther writes to her replacement that it is essential to listen to the Chamberlain (148-149). "You will be given a gatekeeper, a person who knows intimately the King and whose favor will do much toward gaining that of His Majesty. Listen to this person, for he speaks in the Kings' stead. He knows every one of the King's preferences and tastes. Heed his admonitions as well as you heed mine - or better. Seek his counsel, then follow it as if your life depended on it - for it may indeed be so.
(...) You may say that's fairly elementary advice. But of hundreds of girls who came to Xerxes' harem when I did, I was the only one who lived by this axiom. Nearly every other candidate allowed the luxury and stature of living at the King's Palace to go to her head.
(...)Among other things, many began to treat Hegai as some sort of personal footservant. (...) And Hegai, ever the wise one, did not bridle or openly protest this uncalled-for treatment - although in the Palace hierarchy he was far more influential than any of us. He merely dropped the girl who acted this way from his list of favorites. And just as quickly, her chance of becoming queen effectively ended. The girls had no idea, of course. They were too wrapped up in their own elation to even notice they had fallen from any sort of standing. They simply went about their indulgences and chased after the esteem of the other girls - the last group from whom a prudent would ever seek approval."

Later, in the royal bounty room (157-158), the women are allowed to choose whatever they would like for their nights with the king. Anything they choose, they may keep. Esther doesn't know what to take. A conversation like this ensues -

H: Is everything all right, Star?
E: Oh certainally, Hegai. I'm just a little overwhelmed, is all.
H: I'm watching you, and awe is not what I see in your eyes. Please tell me. You haven't selected a sing thing. If you do not hurry, all the best pieces will be gone. Despite the amount of spoils here, only a finite number are actually wearable by a young woman.
E: Hegai, my problem is this - I can pick out a hundred objects that might have some appeal to me, but what does the king like? What does he prefer? I won't feel capable of truly pleasing him on that night until I know more about him.(long pause) Master Hegai, did I offend you in some way?
H: No, no, Star. Far from it. You see, this is the first time a girl, or anyone in the harem for that matter, has ever asked me that simple question. Can you believe it?
E: No. It seems like the first question one would ask.
H: Indeed it does, my dear. However, this place does not lend itself to focusing on others, as I'm sure you have noticed by now.
E:Well, will you teach me? Or at least give me some idea? I really want to know.
H: Yes, Star. I will teach you. And I'll do more that that. You've just solidified your position as my favored candidate. Prepare to move out of your present quarters. I am giving you the double suite and seven handmaidens to serve you, as befits the leading candidate. your conduct will serve as an example for the other girls, and I will repeatedly exhort them to follow your lead. I', sure you are equal to the task, are not, Star?

After that, Hegai helps Esther in many ways with tips and tidbits and good treatment. He advises her that one of the best way to get pleasure during sex is to seek foremost to please your partner. That of course is something that is still an elemental truth today. Another thing that goes well for Esther is that she follows her Jewish dietary laws, and does not indulge in the special foods of the palace. This keeps her slender, as the other girls add a few pounds.